No one jumps a 20 foot chasm in two 10 foot jumps. | The Daily Prompt

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(Picture Source)

Written for the Daily Prompt.

You need to make a major change in your life. Do you make it all at once, cold turkey style, or incrementally?

The picture above probably has you assuming that I make all of my changes in one fell swoop.  “Go big or go home!” That isn’t the case, though.  Incremental change is what I like where most things are concerned, but it really does depend on what it is I’m tackling. As excited as I get about things and want to go “all in,” I find that I’m just not brave enough to do that, usually.  I like change… but only when I know my desired outcome is going to be achieved.

On the other hand, I never really get the dramatic results I want when I change things bit by bit.  This would make sense, right?  Why would I expect to lose 20lbs in 2-3 months if I’m only exercising 30 minutes a day (compared to 2-3 times a week) and eating cleaner (when I didn’t eat horrible to begin with)?  Well, I wouldn’t expect that… but that’s besides the point.  What matters is that you need to change big things to see big results.

I should just tell Fear to fuck off.

Afterall, no one jumps a 20 foot chasm in two 10 foot jumps.

Shackled. (The Daily Prompt)

You’re locked in a room with your greatest fear. Describe what’s in the room.

*BAM!*  I jump as the door slams behind me.  I can’t see; there’s no light.  There’s not even a window.

What am I going to do?  My eyes will never adjust to this!  How am I going make my way without falling?  How am I going to survive if I don’t know what’s coming? I can’t do this.  Ican’tdothisIcan’tdothis!

I slowly crouch down and sit on the floor.  I begin to cry because I don’t know what else to do.

What…..what is that?!  

My heart pounds even more rapidly now. I frantically look around, as if I am able to see through the thick blackness.  It feels so constrictive – as if someone has shrouded me in such a way that I cannot move.

Am I suffocating?  Oh my god, I’m suffocating!  It’s absolutely crippling me!  It’s only been a few minutes, right?  I’ve only been in here a few minutes… RIGHT?  It feels like it’s been hours, and I haven’t done anything except sit on my ass and cry.  I still can’t see anything.  I can’t do anything because I’m wearing shackles.  I can’t move.  What if there’s a hole over there? What if I fall in?  What if I make a mistake that I can’t recover from?  What if…?

No. Nonono!  I can’t!  I won’t!  I’ll just sit here.  This, right here… is safe.  If I don’t move or don’t do anything, at least I know what it feels like.  Then I won’t have to be as scared.  I’ll become comfortable sitting right here. Silent and still.  Then maybe someone will come looking for me.  Maybe someone will rescue me. 

But what if no one does?  What if I go insane?  What if I wither away and die here from starvation?  I don’t want to die!  But I can’t move!

I hope someone comes soon…

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My greatest fears:  Fear and inaction due to that fear.  I don’t want to let fear stop me from doing the things I want to do.  I know what it feels like to be in that room; I never want to allow myself to be held captive again.